Loving the Longed For Child: Pregnancy and Parenting after fertility trauma and loss.

Almost 1 in 7 couples experience fertility issues in the UK today. And nearly 5% of babies born in the UK will have been conceived with the help of IVF. A survey by Fertility Network UK in 2022 also underlines the rise in parents using donor conception and surrogacy to create or expand their families. But many who finally become parents via ART, may have survived a range of traumatic experiences in the transition to parenthood such as repeated pregnancy loss, infertility diagnosis, reproductive injury and traumatic medical procedures. This lecture will explore the concept of fertility trauma (Jaffe & Diamond, 2011) as it emerges for both parent and baby in their earliest relationship. Amongst the concepts to be explored in the webinar are pregnancy intendedness vs parenting preparedness, the idea of the penumbra or replacement child, attachment relationships to in vitro babies or 'embabies' as well as typical psychological processes such as 'emotional cushioning' and dissociation as they pertain to and colour the very particular experience of loving the longed for child after fertility trauma and loss.

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Julianne is the Clinical Director and Founder of the Parenthood In Mind practice. She is a passionate and highly experienced perinatal psychologist who has worked for over 20 years in the NHS and private practice with parents and parents-to-be and their babies (and bumps) who have needed support with a wide variety of issues including anxiety and depression during and after pregnancy, miscarriage and reproductive loss, attachment issues, re-emergence of childhood issues and couples issues. Julianne is a member of the Birth Trauma Association and specialises in working therapeutically with birth trauma, PTSD and tokophobia (fear of giving birth) as they impact the mother, couple relationship and parent-infant attachment. In addition, she is also affiliated with BICA (British Infertility Counselling Association) and offers tailored psychological interventions for individuals and couples (including same sex couples) who are pregnant or are parenting following ART (IVF, ICSI, donor conception, surrogacy) or adoption. She also specialises in offering psychological support to parents (either individually or together) who are co-parenting in the midst of separation and divorce. She has over 15 years’ experience teaching and training psychologists and health professionals on issues of parental mental health, attachment, early years and positive mental health for babies and young children.

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OXPIP Lecture - Julianne Boutaleb